Take home message

PUT YOUR OWN MASK ON FIRST.

For Coaches

You are no good to anyone if you are no good to yourself. It is not selfish - it’s common sense.

For Athletes

Keep an eye on coaches or parents - the people who likely put you first - who may not be taking care of themselves first. They cannot help you if they’re out of action.

“Stress”, she said.

“Doc”, I started, with a smooth, endearing smile, “I’m going to stop you there. I’m a strength and conditioning coach. We don’t suffer stress”, I suavely reassured her, insisting it was something else. I was later told by my wife that I was not nearly as charming or witty as I thought. Damm. That fentanyl is really, really good stuff.

Stress. Not sure if I should be happy or sad with the ER doc’s diagnosis. Happy because there are far more serious causes of the debilitating abdominal pain I had been experiencing the past 24 hours. Or sad, because stress is a sign of weakness. Ouch. I guess I’m not Wolverine or a Super Dad after all!

I was in a Perth hospital, hours after landing from our first training camp in Darwin. We all thought I had gastro, without the throwing up or … the other sign. Just unrelenting stomach pain going nowhere. But it wasn’t gastro.

Six weeks out from the Olympics and it turns out, I could not handle the stress. The doc said to take a few days off. Yeah, sure. I’ve had probably less than 5 sick days in my career - no time for being sick! Maybe after the Games are done.

Long story short, stress put me in the ER. Very deflating. Here I considered myself as bullet proof as any indestructible coach. But my symptoms were not a result of drug or alcohol abuse which only left stress. Which kind of feels worse because it is more like a weakness. How can I work with an elite team and not handle stress? Isn’t that a requirement of high performance?

And why now, six weeks out? Was it the culmination of the past year? The entire Olympic cycle? Was my stress level just simmering under a threshold and one incident tipped me over the edge? Did I miss warning signs? Did someone else?

I don’t know the answers, or I do and too stubborn to admit that it is probably a combination of everything. Almost three months on, I’ve sort of modified my behaviour, but long held habits are hard to adjust. I know I snuck in an afternoon nap during the recent tour. My biological fuel light flashing, so I finally listened and found a quiet place for a rest. Two hours later, emerging refreshed. Coaches not surprised I needed the rest, just surprised I actually took it.

I write this as a reminder to coaches, athletes and parents, are you really managing yourself? I’m the first to say, “no, I do not”, and I think my colleagues and players would recognise that in me. I put other people’s oxygen mask on first and put mine on once I am satisfied I’ve helped everyone else.

I like working hard. I don’t like not having time as an excuse. I like to be dependable and get it done and over-deliver.

But… I’d also like to last and not burn out. I’d like to be ok switching off when it’s time to switch off. And I’d like to be a bit fitter and healthier.

I’ve some modifying to do. Time to listen to my own advice perhaps?

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Thanks again. BA.

My journey to the ER

Take home message

PUT YOUR OWN MASK ON FIRST.